Here’s something that boggles my mind. We’ve all heard the riddle: Which weighs more — a pound of feathers or a pound of lead? The answer, of course, is that they weigh exactly the same thing — one pound. So… how come two ounces of potato chips will make you heavier than 2 pounds of lettuce?
Sigh. It’s all so unfair.
Q: What do you call someone who looks down on and makes nasty comments about African Americans?
A: A Racist.
Q: What do you call someone who looks down on and makes nasty comments about Jews?
A: An anti-semite.
Q: What do you call someone who looks down on and makes nasty comments about homosexuals?
A: A homophobe.
Q: What do you call someone who looks down on and makes nasty comments about fat people?
A: Catherine.
The “notice a theme” link is down; the owner of the picture has made it private. But if you look at other pictures from the event, you will see people of all shapes and sizes having a good time. You will also notice none of them seem to be really stuffing their faces. Yes, there are large amounts of food (or “boiling fat and blood” as Catty Cathy puts it), but it’s also a pretty big crowd, and we all know that running out of food at a food party is a big faux pas.
But projecting your issues on someone else is a bigger faux pas. And that’s exactly what this blogger did. It only takes a little reading between the lines to figure out that Catherine has food issues. Most fat-bashers do. The naturally skinny people I know don’t go around deriding overweight people, or whining about how it’s hard work to stay thin. They don’t deprive themselves and they aren’t slaves to the gym — they eat what they want and are either blessed with better metabolisms, or smaller appetites, or coping mechanisms that preclude stress eating. No one is arguing that there is a direct correlation between eating too much (or moving too little) and weight gain. But anyone who believes that these are the only factors is just plain ignorant. Don’t believe me? There are people struggling to gain weight, that will tell you it takes more than packing it in to pack on the pounds.
Of course, I can’t really blame her for going after the fatties. Overweight people are an easy target. It’s not cool to go around saying “That’s so gay” or calling people retards. But it’s still open season on fatties because they have no one to blame but themselves, right? And besides, they can take a joke, can’t they, seeing as how they’re so darn jolly.
But here’s what I do blame her for:
1. Taking a single picture out of context to support a hateful rant (and make no mistake, she was spewing hate as surely as if she dropped an N-bomb or used Jew as a verb.
2. Not coming clean about how her own struggles with food (and her vegetarianism) helped shape her hateful rant.
3. Claiming she wishes Taco Tammy well in her business endeavor after accusing her of serving “nauseatingly nasty shit.” Hypocrite much?
4. That appalling picture at the top of her post (real subtle way of letting overweight people know that you don’t see them as people but as ambulant blobs of lard).
5. That appalling picture of what I can only assume is her own ass at the top of her other blog. If you’re such a bad-ass that you want to tell your commenters to kiss your ass, why don’t you do it on the original blog?
And by the way, she may be a bitch, but she doesn’t look that skinny to me.
Sarah Palin an idiot. She’s going to run for president, and if I were her opponent in the primaries, I’d be like “Mrs. Palin, you quit your job in Alaska because you didn’t want to be a lame duck. You put your pride before your commitment to the people of Alaska. So why should Americans trust you to keep your commitment as president.” I’d hammer that point in every commercial. “When the going gets tough, Palin quits. You can’t trust a quitter to be president.” I think this is the dumbest thing she has ever done, and that’s saying quite a lot. And to try to pin it on her kids after she’s gone on and on about how it’s discriminatory to imply that she can’t do the job because of her 12 kids, that’s an insult to all working mothers.
A Palin aide is saying she actually quit because all the Freedom of Information requests, ostensibly made by potential opponents, were costing Alaska too much money. The problem with that argument is that even after she leaves office, the state will still have to comply with FOIA requests; stepping down doesn’t cancel out her record anymore than quitting your job makes your personnel file disappear.And the whole “everybody picks on me” thing is getting really old. They’re not out to get you because you’re a lady, sweetie, or even a conservative lady. They’re out to get you because you ran for the second highest office in the land and for some inexplicable reason you’re considered a viable candidate for the presidency. If you wanna run with the big boys, you need to learn to take it like a man.
OK. I’ve been lazy. Haven’t posted in forever. So rather than do the cliche sorry I haven’t blogged” apology, I’m going to amuse you with my first attempt at live blogging.
OK, so the cabinet is being introduced. Hil is working it in a red pant suit. Where is Ryan Seacrest? I want to know who she’s wearing! There’s a bunch of guys in boring suits behind her. Somebody should hire Mickey Rourke’s stylist. These dudes are appointed, so what’s the worst that could happen?
OK, I’m not loving the white and red striped tie. Makes me think of a candy cane. Michelle looks fab though. And no, I’m not gonna spend the whole night critiqueing the fashion, but he hasn’t started talking yet, so chill, people!
9:13 Just realized that I should put the time in front so it looks more livebloggy and professional. Also, gotta remember to not start every comment with “OK.”
9:15 Goes up to the mic and says thank you.
9:16 They finally settle down. Pelosi introduces him. They go nuts again for almost another minute. Then they go semi-nuts for Michelle.
9:18 Starts with the economy. Syas if you haven’t been affected, you know someone who has. Amen. On both counts. “We will rebuild” makes me think of hurricanes. Yeah, that’s about right.
9:20 “Hardest working people on earth.” Um, yeah because we don’t get enough vacation time. Lots of other countries are highly productive and offer weeks of vacation.
9:23 I don’t believe in bigger government. I think a lot of people would disagree with that. Mentions passing the stim. The crowd goes nuts. Except for REPs, they just sit on their ass. How apropos.
9:25 Mentions tax cut and husband says “Yeah, $12 a week.” Excuse me, mister, you’re supposed to be on Team Obama. And like I’ve said to countless others, if you don’t want an extra 12 bucks a week, I’ll gladly accept yours.
9:26 Re Biden: “Nobody messes with Joe!”
9:28 Creating a new lending fund for cars, homes, college and entrepreneurs to keep the economy going. Re-fi program for those dealing with declining home values. Isn’t that EVERYONE here in Florida?
9:30 Don’t want to harp on fashion, but Nancy, baby, you don’t wear a necklace with that neckline. Also that jacket makes you look tubby. Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.
9:31 Still talking about how bankers need to stop being giant money-wasting tools. Lieberman looks constipated. What else is new?
9:33 I know how unpopular it is to help banks right now… My job is to solve the problem, govern with a sense of resposibility…I will do whatever it take to help small business pay their workers and families buy homes. Crowd goes semi-nuts.
9:36 Cut to some guy that looks like Stephen Colbert, but isn’t.
9:37 Talking about the New Deal and how the gov’t didn’t supplant private enterprise and created a big middle class and the crowd went nuts.
9:38 My dinner is getting cold. Liveblogging is hard.
9:39 Talking energy. Our plug-in hybrids run on Korean batteries. It’s time for america to lead again. Even the REPs get up for that one. Do you really want to be the guy caught sitting, while everyone’s giving America a standing-O.
9:41 Auto industry shouldnn’t be protected from their own bad practice…I believe the nation that invented the automobile cannot walk away from it. Um, yeah, but it wouldn’t hurt if we took the bus. Energy efficiency, ya know?
9:43 Talking healthcare reform now. Cut to a blonde lady in a fabulous light blue suit. Is that a tiny Israeli flag on her lapel? Whatever, she looks FAB. Yeah, I know, less fashion, more Obama.
9:44 Need a cure for cancer in our time. Largest investment ever in preventive care.Does that mean I get a free gym membership?
9:45 We must have quality affordable health care for every American. Healthcare reform cannot wait, and WILL NOT WAIT another year. Husband with the flu coughs loudly. Unintentionally hilarious, but I don’t laugh.
9:46 Countries that out-teach us today will out-compete us tomorrow. If I was a teacher I would SOOO make that my sig. And put it on a bumper sticker.
9:48 Tonight I ask every American to commit to at least one year of post high school education. Dropping out is quitting on your country. Funny-looking redhead guy clapping.
9:49 Wants us to go back to having the highest percentage of college grads of any country. Yeah, it’s a good thing I have a degree, if I didn’t I’d probably be working in a store for less than $10 an hour. Oh wait.
9:50 Name-checks Teddy K. Crowd goes nuts.
9:51 I’m gonna google a copy of the speech, because I’m missing stuff as I type.
9:52 “…the deficit we inherited..” got a huge laugh. This is what passes for comedy in the House. Oy vey!
9:54 Eliminate no-bid contracts that wasted $$$$$ in Iraq and end tax breaks for corps who ship our jobs oversees. Mu husband claps. I work in retail, my job can’t be shipped oversees. It can be cut (God forbid), but it can’t be shipped. I guess I’m better off than I realized.
9:56 Talkin’ tax cuts for people who make under $250,000. Presente!
9:56 Honest budget will account for stuff we left off the books before. Like, oh, I don’t know the IRAQ WAR! I still can’t believe they were pulling that scam. That’s like applying for a mortgage and overstating your income and ending up with a house you can’t afford. But, I guess it’s OK when the government does it.
9:57 Not sure what he just said, but McCain got up. But he didn’t look happy about it. Getting up, I mean.
9:59 Wants to gives our soldiers a raise. Here, here!
10:00 THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA DOES NOT TORTURE!!!! And now it’s actually true!
10:02 Cut to Sully. Sully ROCKS!!! And he looks quite smart in a pilot’s uniform by US Airways.
10:03 Shout out to Leonard Abess, repping the 305!!! Bienvenido a Miami!
10:06 Ty’Sheoma Bethea looks like a sweet kid, and probably wise beyond her years. She looks like a mini-adult.
10: 06 My food is ice cold now. I’ll probably nuke it before the Republican response. Yeah, I know you don’t really care.
10:09 Thank you, God bless you and may God bless the United States of America. You see, rednecks, he did NOT say Allah Akbar. Can you chill out now? Pretty please!
10:10 Wolf and Anderson Cooper are chatting it up. And John King, but he doesn’t amuse me like Wolf, or my boyfriend the Coop!
10:12 David Gergen (sp?) is mumbling again. He’s the Horation Caine of CNN. Dude, you’re on TV!
10:14 Apparently some members of Congress were tweeting on their blackberries. Rude much?
10:15 Roland is comparing Obama to Kanye. Racist! Ha, just kidding. Coop makes a lame Fiddy joke. And now I’m a little less in love with him… OK, I’m over it! Call me, Anderson!
10:17 Some guy wants to play golf with Obama. O says his golf is terrible. Um, it’s probably better than your bowling, dude. I mean Mister President, dude.
10:19 Extreme close up of the inside of some guy’s ear. For the first time I thank God I don’t have an HD big screen TV. Now there’s a bunch of cute girls crowding around Obama. Probably interns wanting to discuss his “stimulus package.” Yeah, I know that was lame.
10:20 Commercials! Time to heat up my chicken tikka masala in time for Bobby Jindal. I swear I didn’t do that on purpose!
10:25 Jindal is on. Happy Mardi Gras! Makes lame “pre-existing condition joke” and says “lucky for me” his parents never missed a payment. Yeah, like the OB/GYN would repo a kid! They should send his speech writer to GITMO.
10:27 Where we agree REPs should be the President’s strongest partners. Yeah, I’ll be waiting for that. Don’t worry if I turn blue, I’m one of the lucky ones with health insurance.
10:28 Was that Katrina story supposed to be heart-warming?
10:29 The way to lead is not to raise taxes…it’s by empowering YOU the American people.
10:30 THERE IS NO TRAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10:30 Husband points out they’re not offering solutions either.
10:31 If it can be done in Baton Rouge, it can be done in DC. I don’t know who should be more offended by that statement.
10:32 We believe in health care for everybody, just not government run. Doctors and patients should make decisions. Unless that decision involves abortion, I’m assuming.
10:33 We need to bring transparency to DC. You mean like including the cost of Iraq in the budget. Pot — meet kettle! Also rips Congress for not reading the stim bill. Yeah, like they read the Patriot Act?
10:35 Empower individuals and small businesses. I swear this is like the 20hundredth time I’ve heard this. Our party is determined to regain your trust. Good luck with that!
10:36 Don’t let anyone tell us we cannot recover. Um, who said that? And he says we emerged from the Great Depression. Hmmm, wonder who did that. The most, the biggest, the best… he forgot the most beautiful, sexiest, most talented, and well-endowed.
10:38 Um, that was fast. Is that all there is? So I’m thinking the powers that be at GOP headquarters sat around deciding which not-a-white-guy was going to deliver it. The guy seems enough, but first Michael Steele, now Jindal… it’s gonna suck to be an old white guy in the GOP for the next four years. Just sayin’.
10:43 The Coop will be crunching numbers. Oh, baby!
10:44 That’s it. Liveblogging is over. I have to go re-reheat my dinner now.
A couple of days ago, I remembered to do something that I had been meaning to do for quite some time: I took my self-storing, reusable Target shopping bag with me when I left the house, since I knew I’d be going to the grocery store later. Now I know that every store is selling these reusable bags for $.99 a pop or thereabouts. But only Target has this particular, fantastic model. Basically, it folds up into itself and then zips up so you can carry it around in your purse. Not only is it brilliant, when it’s unfolded, it’s bigger than most reusable bags (save those jumbo ones at Ikea) and even has a handy-dandy front pocket. Just one of the many reasons I love Target!
So I get to the grocery store with this reusable bag that I bought like six months ago, and I go to the dish detergent aisle. And instead of grabbing my “usual brand” (read: whatever happens to be cheapest per ounce), I pick up one of those earth-friendly ones and start reading the package. Did you know that most dish soap is petroleum based?!?! Um, I didn’t. So even though it was more expensive, I ended up buying it. Because it’s not just about saving money on gas, ya know.
Gratuitous picture of Bono, because he’s way hotter than Al Gore.
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